There are 3 Types of Girlfriends

I come from a family of mostly women. My sisters are 24, 19, 17, 13 and 3. I’m 21. FullSizeRenderSo it’s safe to say that the women in my family are dealing with a lot of the same issues when it comes to relationships. I read an article online the other day that may or may not have some truth to it. After all, you never know with the Internet. It said that 70% of men cheat on their partners regularly. Ugh how sad is that?

Anyway basically, almost all of my sisters have been cheated on at some point. I’m pretty sure all of my girlfriends have been cheated on or lied to at some point during a relationship. It’s a part of growing up. We, as women, learn how to handle these situations in different ways. It may depend on your personality type. Are you outgoing and confrontational? Or are you quiet and passive? It can also depend on the relationship. If your relationship was pretty chill and laid back for the most part, you might handle infidelity pretty well. Maybe you didn’t care that much anyway. If your relationship is super passionate, you’ll probably be heartbroken and freak the f out.

The other day one of my sisters (who wishes to remain anonymous) was crying. I’m like “what are you crying about?” And she’s like “so and so cheated on me with what’s her face.”

Woah. I’m thinking, “What a little biotch, she’s supposed to be your friend.”
I’m real sympathetic because I’ve been there. I’m like “Ew, he wasn’t even cute. Don’t waste good makeup crying over that loser.” And then she kinda smiles.

Ok, I’m confused.

She goes on to tell me that she confronted him when she found out about it. Her friends recorded the confrontation. So my sister pulls out her iPhone and shows me this video. It’s basically a cameraman following my little sister around. She walks up to her now ex-boyfriend, grabs him and punches him. I’m seriously crying tears of joy. My little sister is a type C girlfriend.

You see, there are three types of girlfriends. Type A is what should be considered normal. When Type A girlfriend is cheated on, she’s calm. She’s collected. She’ll calmly confront her significant other and, if she’s level headed enough, she’ll dump his sorry ass. She’ll leave it at that. She might cry for a few days. Rip up some old photos. But that’s pretty much it.

Then there are Type B girlfriends. These are the ones who don’t really know how to react. It varies, honestly. I used to be a Type B girlfriend. When I found out my boyfriend cheated, I texted his mom and told her what a worthless crapbag her son was. I even sent her screenshots to prove that he was a cheater. Type B girlfriends are sneaky. They usually find out by stalking and going through text messages. Anyway after the breakup they might drunk dial him a few times or whatever. They’re not sure how to handle this. A lot of times Type B will take him back afterwards because she feels like he really and truly deserves a second chance. This usually backfires.

Then there are Type C girlfriends. These are the ones you have to look out for. They’re crazy. They’re obsessive. Psychotic, if you may. These girlfriends aren’t sneaky. They’re extremely confrontational. They’re gonna approach you when they find out. Hit you, slap you, whatever. But that’s not it. They’ll then blast you on social media. Call you out. Tag your mom in the post. And THEN they’ll get drunk one night and drive to your house. They might bang on your door to wake you up and call you a “lying son of a bitch.” Or they might take a bat to your windshield. You really never know with this type.

Anyway, I’m proud that my little sister was a Type C. She knows how to vocalize her anger.

This story is loosely based on kind of true events, in case a police officer or my dad is reading it. All of my sisters and I are Type A girlfriends. Totally normal. No craziness here.

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